I tried writing another post today but self-doubt got the better of me today, again.
I feel like the doubt in my head is a powerful force that grows stronger for every word I type. I finish a word and the voice in my head tells me that that's the wrong word. Do better. I push on and finally manage to finish the sentence but the voice in my head just criticizes me and tells me that it's not very clear, that I should just be quiet because I don't know what I'm talking about. Do something else. Do something else. Do something else.
I recognize that this negative self-talk is actually just a small part of what's in my head and that there's a lot more in there. Unfortunately my self-doubt is like a giant bully and everyone else in there is quiet. The self-talk grows worse and everyone else is just rolling their thumbs, looking sheepishly away and whispering to me to take a break, even if only just a short one. Maybe look at Instagram? Come back to it later when the doubt is sleeping.
I'm so tired of this voice.
I try welcoming it in.
Come on in. Please sit down. What brings you here?
I understand that you're trying to help me but you aren't needed right now. In fact, I wish you weren't here. How could you support me instead?
I know I'm not the best writer but I'm trying to improve. How are you helping me achieve that? What makes me unique? I don't know but does that matter? Maybe that's what I'm doing here? Trying to find my voice. Trying to figure it all out. I know the statistics about the amount of content being created every day... but why should that mean that I can't create anything?